"Reading"

Two days ago Anisa "read" a book for the first time by narrating the pictures in it. Until now, she has been using giberish to pretend-read. She also pretended to read in Czech for the first time using the rhythm of the poems in the book she was "reading."

Nisa-the-Pooh

It was a warm day, and he had a long way to go. He hadn't gone more than half-way when a sort of funny feeling began to creep all over him. It began at the tip of his nose and trickled all through him and out at the soles of his feet. It was just as if somebody inside him were saying, "Now then, Pooh, time for a little something."

Anisa has started to occasionally ask for something. When she says, "Mom, I want something, pleeeeease," or, "Mama, can I have something?" she scans the kitchen counter and the top of the fridge in case she sees a snack she wants up there. By something she really means a treat. Hello, Nisa-the-Pooh?

"What about a mouthful of something?"

Pooh always liked a little something at eleven o'clock in the morning.

- from Winnie-the-Pooh by A. A. Milne

Blame game

Yesterday marked a milestone. I discovered my daughter drew on our outdoor bench with a pen while I wasn't looking. I told her that's not okay, that she should only draw on paper, which she knows well. In response, she said: "Písi bratr" which in Czech kid language means, "Brother wrote it."

Can you believe it? Already trying to blame her brother and she is not even two yet? We're in for a real adventure ahead.

More kid quotes

(My oldest son's quotes from his first years can be found here)

DECEMBER 2015

I asked Jonah if he had a choice if he'd go to school five days a week, two or three days a week or learn outside of school. He said he would like to learn outside of school. I asked him what he would do with his time, he said he would have gym every day because P.E. is his favorite subject. He said he would skateboard, play basketball and ride his bike. 

A: When I grow up, I want to be a lion.

me: Do you want to see what you were doing when you were your sister's age?
J: No. 
me: Why not?
J: It's just embarrassing. It's embarrassing when you do things like that, Mom.

A, coming home from daycare: I played with some babies and I made a few dollars.

Jonah: "I´m great at limbo. I´m the best limboer in 5th grade."

Anisa, singing: "This is how you rub yourself, rub yourself, rub yourself early in the morning."

Jonah: My poop comes whenever it wants."


NOVEMBER 2015

A: I'm super super.

Anisa to me, playing with her wallet: You can watch me get money!

Daughter takes out her play pliers and says: "Mama I'm gonna cut you off your head."

me: You're a genius. Do you know what genius means?
A: Yeah. It means who's my daddy.

A, playing with a potato while in the bathtub: The potato's in my 'gina.

Daughter asks, "What does sorry mean?" She apologizes at the right times, usually after screaming or not listening, so I'm surprised she doesn't know the meaning of sorry. I explain that it's said when someone feels bad to make the person feel better. She wonders, "Is it like happy birthday?"

A, waking up with a stuffy nose: "My nose is not going to work today."

Daughter: "I don't want dinner every day. I don't like dinner."
me: "That's crazy."
Daughter, shouting: "That's not crazy!"
Pause. "Sorry I screamed, Mama."

When I gave her the choice of cereal or oatmeal for breakfast, she said: "I don't know how to think," meaning she couldn't decide. 

A: "Oxygen! My favorite!"

 OCTOBER 2015

• me: Do you want the sound (track) of rain as you fall asleep?

A: No, I not want rain. I want rainbow.

• Anisa, seeing her dad and me hugging: Dada, you hug mama really well. 

• Jonah: I'm going to find out if the Tooth Fairy is real. I have a motion detector in my doorway.

• J: I farted three times.

• J: I don't have arachnophobia. I just don't like spiders in my personal space.

• J: I like Mr.H (his teacher). He tells jokes. They're not funny, but it's funny that they're not funny.

• A, climbing on the doctor´s stool while at the doctor´s office: Iḿ trying to be the doctor.

• While putting on a fireman´s hat, Anisa says, ¨I´m fire dada.¨
Me: I love you, fire dada.
A: You not love fire dada.
Me: Who do I love? Coffee shop dada? (Her dad runs a coffee shop).
A: Yes, you love coffee shop dada.

• Anisa: It´s too way hot.

• A: Dada, I wanna play with your peter (peter = computer)

• A. seeing me come out of the shower: Mama, you're so big. 

• A, holding a small ball up

to her chin (as if it were a goatee): "I'm a man."

• Anisa: I love ice cream ever much. 

• A: Mama, I'm going to turn round and round and get busy. 

•  Hugging me, as A falls asleep: You're so big, Mom.

•  A: I wanna go to HR. (We often spell out "the park" when we talk about going there so Anisa doesn't understand until we've resolved to go to the park. She figured out what the spelled letters mean. P. A. R. became H.R.)


SEPTEMBER 2015

•  As Anisa pretends to eat a piece of her dad, he asks: Do I taste good at least?

A: Yeah. 

Dad: What do I taste like?

A: Cheese. 
 
•  A to a doll on her lap sitting at her kids' table: "That's my phone. Don't touch it. Don't touch the peter. Did you touch the peter?" (peter = computer)

• I burp, my daughter says, "Excuse you."

• Anisa to me: "Do you adore me?"

• Anisa at a playground, running after boys playing basketball: "Boys! Boys!" Turns back at me: "Boys are not talking to me."

• Jonah says he wishes that he didn't have to go to school; that he only goes to spend time with his friends.

• Anisa: (Pointing at a kid she plays with sometimes) That's my friend. 

Me: What's your friend's name?

Anisa: I don't know. His name is Friend. 

• A: I love mama, I love dada... (She continues to list family & friends she loves), I love candy. 

AUGUST 2015

•  A, singing a made-up song: "My doggy fell down on the ground." Another time: "Don't touch my food. It's my special one."

•  Me: Do you like hugging mommy?
A: I like noodles.

•   me: If you cry this much, you need to go lay down for a nap.
A: I just want to cry.

• A: Jonah kick(ed) the ball. What the heck?

•  A, watching Puss in Boots: What the heck?

• me, to J: Are you looking forward to school starting?
J: No.

• A: I give the baby a peter (aka computer).

• A: I get my person (aka purse).

• Me: Do you want me to take a bath with you?
A: No, I don't.
Me: You don't want mommy to bathe with you? That's amazing.
A: It's not amazing, mama.

• A, brush in her hand: I make you pretty, mama.

• A: I wanna play domi-hoes.

• Dad, to A: Do you want to go to the store?
A: Not tonight.

• A: I'm a lady, dada!

• J, to me: You have leg hair on top of your bulging vein. Now ot looks like a furry vein. 

• "Don't kiss my doctor,"Anisa said after playing doctor with a doll and me kissing her nose.

• A to our repair man: Hi, guy. Hello, guy.

•  A, bringing her toy computer to me: "I got a peter. I got my peter. . . I don't like this peter."

• A, pretending to talk on the phone: "Hi mama, hi dada, hi milk."

•  Lately Anisa has been walking around with her unmistakable pretend face saying, "My back really hurts," or "My feet really hurt."

• Jonah's list of comebacks for when he's playing sports and someone says, "What was that?"

1. Wiki that.

2. Google that.

3. Who knows.

4. I don't know.

•  Me: Do you ever wash your belly button? Because I think I see something in it.
My son Jonah: I don't wash it until there's a dirt hill coming out.

• A: I'm a princess.

Me: What's your name, princess?

A: Pink.

• A: I'm scared.

Me: Of what?

A: of Jonah. Jonah's scary. (Pause). I scary, too.

•  J, in a sweet voice to his sister while playing with playdough: Nisa, did you destroy all the bears?

• J rated all the household members on the cuteness index. Baby brother came up on the top, I was last: "You're not cute."
Me: I'm not?
J: Not anymore...
And when my puddle of tears turned into a lake and he finally noticed: You're not a baby anymore. . . But you're awesome.

• J: Mom, do you know much about vanity and fashion?
Me; No, I don't.
J: Oh no. I wanted you to give me advice on what would make my guy look cool.

• A: I pooped a snake.


JULY 2015

•  A: Dada is my mommy.

• Looking out the window: That's my friends.
Me: Who are your friends, Anisa?
A: Mommy.

• A, first thing in the morning: "I wanna watch the news."

• A, while crossing the street in a stroller: "Better hurry."

• Anisa: I want strawberries. (Showing me to the fridge.) Come on, let's go to strawberries.

• me (thoughtlessly, about the baby): He's working on a poop. He's a workoholic.

• me: Do you want popcorn?
J: Oh, poop corn? Yeah. There is also mouse turd. Get it, mustard? Ham boogers and Toot-sie Rolls.

• A: My butt hurts.
me: Come here. Let me check it. It looks fine.
A: Ouch.
me: Do you want a band aid for your butt?
A: No.
Jonah: Do you want a but transplant?
A: (smiles) Yeah. 

• Anisa, yelling at her brother: "No, don't clean me!"

• Looking inside her dad's mouth at his teeth at bedtime: "I see 'dilla in there." Yep, quesadilla between his teeth. Time to floss.

• Anisa looking out the window at the neighbor across the street: "I wanna look neivor. I see neivor. Hello, neivor!"

• Anisa while playing outside in the sandbox: "I smell mommy poop."

• A, randomly while falling asleep: "Hi, doctor."

• Anisa: "I wanna do something right, mama."

• Pointing inside her nose: "Is burger."

•  Anisa puts on her pink tutu wearing nothing else, smiling and pronouncing herself "Princess Lolly."

• Me: Where are you, Anisa?
A: I don't know. (Pause) I over here.

• Me: What do you want to do at the library? Use the computer?
A: Go see Peter.

• After I got Anisa ready, she stood at the door, all dressed, obviously feeling like a million bucks, saying: "I princess," and adding, "Mommy princess."

• Anisa, randomly: "Oh, man!"

• As I finish dressing Anisa in a swimsuit to go in a pool, she looks at me and says: "I'm ready, dude."    
            
   

JUNE 2015

• Anisa, asking dada: "What time is it?... Is it six o'clock?"

• After seeing and me naming her brother's private parts when changing his diaper: "I have a penis too."

• On her birthday, while eating a cupcake deep in thought: "Happy birthday to me."

• Me (referring to baby): He's really fussy.
Anisa: I'm fussy too.

• Me: What is your favorite age so far?
My 9-yr-old son: Eight
Me: What happened when you were 8?
Son: I learned to cook eggs.
Me: Is that why it's your favorite?
Son: Yes.

• Anisa: What's smell?
Me: Does it smell stinky?
Anisa: Yeah.
Me: It's the neighbor cutting grass.
Anisa: Cutting grass? (I nod.) Cutting grass? (I nod.) Cutting poop?

• My 9-year-old son Jonah asking if I'd like to read a book with him: "I'm warning you; it's a graphic novel, and it's full of sound effects which you are really good at."

• Me to my son Jonah: "You are special to me." My 2-year-old daughter Anisa: "I'm special too."

• Jonah: One time I threw a ball so hard my ribcage almost fell out. It almost burst out. Do you know where the ball ended up? In a wheelchair."


MAY 2015

• Anisa, as we approach our house in the car: "Doma!" (which means "home" in Czech), immediately followed by: "Smells like poop."


APRIL 2015

• It's been almost three weeks since I gave birth to our youngest. Today my 9-year-old son taps me on the stomach and says, "Your belly is still fat." Thanks, son.

• My daughter dreams in two languages. The other night she said, "Uh-oh. Prd" in her sleep. Prd means fart in Czech.

• My daughter looks at me and says in a singy-songy voice used to talk to babies: "Mama, you're cute."

• My oldest son tells me I'm "the best mom in the world."

• My daughter pretends to talk on the phone: "Hello, I wash my belly, I wash my hair."

Quote of the Day

My daughter's first noteworthy quote of the day:

I pooped. I did, mommy. I pooped.

Mastering sleep

Sleep is an acquired skill, they say. And we have been coddling our daughter too long, rocking her, consoling her, sleeping by her side just so she goes to sleep and stays asleep. But has this helped? She remains a poor sleeper who wakes up multiple times a night moaning or crying, demanding one of her parents help her fall back asleep.

Well, with the new baby coming in the next few weeks, we have decided to take the leap of finally letting her learn to sleep on her own. Our doula gave us the book, The Sleepeasy Solution, which I have heard about.

Last night was the first night we tried the method. I made a stick figure book describing what our sleep routine is and how it would change now. We read the book several times before starting bedtime. When it was finally time to turn off the lights, Anisa protested. She sounded like the devils in hell were forcing her to walk across a sea of sharp blades. I could see her dad's stomach come up to his throat. But guess what. Her torchure somehow magically stopped after twelve minutes of hysterics. And then it was quiet. She fell asleep on the floor of her room. Yes, she woke up multiple times at night, but only "needed" us to check in with her twice. She actually slept better than her parents.

Now we're trying the same for her nap. She cried for a total of one minute. Not bad at all.

After she quieted down last night, Anisa's dad and I were able to sit in the living room together and talk like two grownups without our time being monopolized by kids. My son and I even had a chance, for the first time in a long while, to play a board game, one of my favorite pastimes ever, without his sister getting her little grabby hands on the pieces.

I am feeling hopeful

Queen of feist

 Our 20-month-old has entered her Terrible Twos a bit early, it seems. She goes through mood swings like there is no tomorrow, from screaming mad to lovey dovey within seconds.... fifty times a day. That girl will not take a no for an answer. A no will make her yell, kick and scream till it shakes the house. We're learning to respond in a variety of ways that don't exacerbate the deal. Our girl just likes to keep us on our toes and make sure her opinion is heard by all... including those who live blocks away.

By the way, this is the first fortune she had ever received. I don't doubt it's true.

Funny

At 19 months old, my daughter has quite a sense of humor. She also likes to find any excuse she can to avoid sleep. The other night at bed time she burped, then apologized with a sweet "sorry." She must have learned this in daycare because at my house, who says sorry after a burp? Next, she produced a fake burp and apologized with the cutest little "sorry." She laughed at her own joke and proceeded to make a fart sound with her lips, followed by yet another sorry. This went on for some time. She even remarked "funny," entertained by her own jokes.

The Great Pretender

She hates to sleep, but doesn't mind pretending.

Milestones

• At four-months-old, Anisa had her first four teeth.

• At 5-months-old, she started rolling over from her belly to her back.

• At 5.5 months, she tried solid food for the first time. It was banana mixed with breast milk. She liked it, but then her stomach gave her problems. She had trouble digesting solid food for a long time. Sensitive stomach.

• When she was six-months-old, Anisa and her brother, along with Mom and Dad, got to visit Dad's mom, grandma and aunties. A wonderful trip!

• In March 2014 when she was 9-months-old, Anisa started crawling. A short-lived period since...

• At ten-months-old, she learned to walk. No matter how many times she fell, she wasn't going back to crawling. Her brother Jonah didn't start walking unsupported until almost 13 months. He didn't like falling. Different personalities.

• In July 2014 Anisa, along with Mom and brother, visited the Old Country, her mother's homeland, for the first time. The trip was a realization, or confirmation, that the Czech Republic is not ready for a mixed-race child like my daughter. People stared, gossiped, acted as if she could contaminate or sicken their children, and made hurtful comments, calling her "monkey." No, it's not a comfortable place to visit, let alone live.

• At 16 months Anisa stopped nursing.

• In November 2014 she started daycare.

What she says

I've been keeping a log of the words and my phrases my 19-month old daughter Anisa says. Her first word was mama, next tata and Mario, our dog's name. At 14-months-old, I counted 14 words, half of them in Czech. They were:

mama
tata
Mario
Joh (for Jonah, her big brother)
pejsek (which means doggie in Czech)
papat (to eat in baby language, she used it to ask to nurse
bye
hi
v (for voda which means water)
up
au (Czech for ouch)
pipi (short for pipinka which means birdie)
ne or no (which mean the same thing)
shoe


At 17 months her repertoir consisted of these words:
čaj
v
hami (for eat)
hačí (meaning sit)
pejsek
meow (for cat)
cheese
kaki (for poop)
socks
book or booka or bookaka (a combination of book and knížka)
pipi, she also says "ah-ah" for the sound of the crows and other birds
cracker
night-night
baby (for baby and doll)
apple
tata
mama
Jonah
Mario
(out)side
peaz (for please when she remembers)
no
stop it
au
není (which means, there is no more, or it's not there)
mé (short for méd'a which means Teddy bear)
up
pho(ne)
block
box
high five
yeah
'no
bye-bye
hi
Anisa
papír (which means paper)
puppy
baba (short for bottle)
koník (horsie in Czech)
br (first sound of brouk which means beetle)
houpy hou (which is the sound for swinging) eye or oko
nos (Czech for nose)
open
auto (car)
go
ball
oh no
fall


At 18-months-old, Anisa began to use complete or toddler-style sentences:

What's that?
It's cold.
It's hot.
Don't touch.
It's (a) coat.
Want this.
Want some?
Go outside.
I see you.
I love you.


Now at 19 months, she has added the following to her vocabulary:

huggies
I gotcha
catch
Renika (her sister's name)
bratr (which means brother)
noo-noo for noodles or nudle
mlíko (milk)
býle (brýle means glasses in Czech)
What's this?
dada
outside
sockie
boty (shoes)
nohy (feet and legs in Czech)
button for belly button
moo for cow
maso (meat)
voda (water)
písy písy (means to write in kid language)
bác
blanket
pillow
poop
coat
eh-eh (for yuck)
funny
kuku (for peek-a-boo)
bath
bubble (for bath)
bubbly (for selzer)
teeth
again
oko for ear (but it should be ucho)
egg
oatmeal
amen (for open)
more
for me
mine
Don't touch and Don't touch it
come
Mnam mnam (for yum yum)
"Pop pop" when she wants to hear the Dr. Seuss book, Hop on Pop
tickle-tickle
Where's it?
It's mine.
dip
Here you go